Trailers are an under-appreciated art form insofar that many times they’re seen as vehicles for showing footage, explaining films away, or showing their hand about what moviegoers can expect. Foreign, domestic, independent, big budget: I celebrate all levels of trailers and hopefully this column will satisfactorily give you a baseline of what beta wave I’m operating on, because what better way to hone your skills as a thoughtful moviegoer than by deconstructing these little pieces of advertising? Some of the best authors will tell you that writing a short story is a lot harder than writing a long one, that you have to weigh every sentence. What better medium to see how this theory plays itself out beyond that than with movie trailers?
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Former Tori Spelling deflowerer, turntable spinner and current Terminator TV star, Brian Austin Green, has thrown his hat (sideways baseball cap?) into the casting ring for Batman 3. B.A.G. was wowed by Heath Ledger’s performance in The Dark Knight and feels deep down he’s the right thespian to play The Riddler in the next installment…
“I would love to be the Riddler,” Green told MTV in all seriousness. “I hope to God they don’t replace Heath and have the Joker [again]. So they need a new villain and The Riddler makes sense. …[My Riddler] would take years of preparation. It’s tough. Heath set the bar a new level.”
How do our readers feel about this? Put your love of 90210 aside and be honest. I mean, on one hand, fanboy favorites Johnny Depp or Hugo Weaving could wash away Jim Carrey‘s annoying red hair and green nylon body suit, but on the deformed other, Brian Austin Green made One Stop Carnival, one of the indisputable white rapper masterpieces of the ’90s. Riddle me this? How many babysitters had their beloved copies thrown into the woods? Plus, B.A.G.’s last name is a big qualification for the role, and so is “I bang Megan Fox.” Brian Austin Green, the actor, the question, the joke.
Discuss: B.A.G. for The Riddler? Megan Fox for Catwoman? Tori Spelling for Bane?
Balls: /Film reader and B.A.G. contrarian Joseph Ferrarelli says, “Ya know what? I was down on [casting] Ledger. I’m not going to make the same mistake twice.”