Every Movie Scene Where Someone Beats The S*** Out Of Paul Dano, Ranked

Paul Dano is one of the most dependable and versatile character actors working today. Throughout his career, he has shown a complete lack of vanity in choosing which parts to play. Dano drifts towards the unseemly, the odd, and the extreme a lot of the time, but he can also bring a tremendous amount of warmth and understanding to a character. A common denominator for many of the roles he takes on is that he tends to play extremely passionate people. Whether that be religious and financial passion in "There Will Be Blood," artistic passion in "Love & Mercy," or a passion for being a horrific racist in "12 Years a Slave," all of Dano's characters have a drive that make them compelling, even at their most vile. Shockingly, Paul Dano has not been seen in a film since 2017 with "Okja," as he took time out to direct his terrific first feature film, "Wildlife." So, it only makes sense he makes a big splashy return to the silver screen, which he does as The Riddler in "The Batman."

Now, all this stuff about the psychologies of his characters is all well and good, but Paul Dano excels at something else on screen: getting the s**t beat out of him. Because he will often play people you don't necessarily want to be in the same room with, seeing someone go to town on him can be a bit cathartic, and when he does play a highly sympathetic figure, he makes you want to protect him like a puppy. He also has this fantastic high-pitched yet somewhat rough yelp that serves many scenes in which he gets beat up. That little scream can make him seem pathetic, and depending on the context, we can determine if we should pity him for it.

For this piece, I will take a look at every movie scene in which Paul Dano gets hit. A scene's placement on the list will be based on a number of factors. First, there's the brutality. How badly would this actually hurt? Second, there's how it affects the story. Does him getting hurt create any kind of narrative or character development? Lastly, there's the notion of whether or not he "deserved" it. If it's immensely satisfying for him to get his comeuppance, it gets a bump. If he doesn't deserve it but he isn't supposed to, it gets a bump. Of course, I also reserve the right to include some personal preferences for certain moments at my own discretion. So let's take a look at the beauty and range of people beating the s**t out of Paul Dano.

In the 2000s, Paul Dano appeared in a string of incredibly low budget movies, often dealing with the lives of people living in poverty and harsh conditions. One of them is "Weapons," a grimy movie about a sexual assault. Dano's character is someone constantly carrying around a videocamera and shooting everything, and in a particularly heated moment, he gets the camera smacked out of his hands. This chapter of the film is told entirely through the point of view of Dano's camera. Things look like they might escalate from there, with Dano on the verge of getting a serious beatdown, but nothing happens. He picks up the camera and leaves. I understand the impulse to smack the camera out of his hands. Being filmed constantly is exceptionally annoying.

Brutality: 3

Story and Character: 4

Did He Deserve It?: Yes

Cheating on your girlfriend is never a good thing to do. If you are unhappy in your relationship, just end it. Don't have your flight attendant girlfriend come home after work to find an ashtray next to the bed with lipstick-stained cigarettes. Especially don't do it if your girlfriend is the great Katherine Waterston. Well, this is exactly what happens in the forgotten Paul Dano/Robert De Niro starring film "Being Flynn." In retaliation to this betrayal, Waterston's character starts pelting Dano with books from across the room. While not the most intimidating of objects to throw at someone, particularly if they are paperback books, they still get the point across. Aside from the impact of the books themselves, which could hurt, you do run the risk of giving someone a rogue paper cut. This scene comes very early in the film and tells you all you need to know about Dano's character, as well as the growth he needs to go through. Pretty standard dramatic scene here, and a pretty unremarkable, if justified, assault.

Brutality: 3

Story and Character: 5

Did He Deserve It?: Yes

One would expect the Riddler to get into a fight with the Dark Knight and probably receive somewhat of a beatdown in "The Batman." This is not the case. Batman and the Riddler have zero physical interaction throughout the whole movie. The only altercation he gets into is when the police arrest him, slamming his head on the counter. It's a totally fine scene. He's a serial killer, so him getting a little roughed up by police is expected, though it's pretty restrained compared to what a real cop would do. (Then again, the Riddler is a white guy, so maybe it's accurate after all.) "The Batman" is a major missed opportunity for this list. Dano is playing a Batman villain and doesn't get the s**t beat out of him by Batman! The brooding hero does beat up guys who dress up as the Riddler, but not the man himself. I had so much anticipation for where a fight scene from "The Batman" would appear on this list. Unfortunately, it does not live up to its potential.

Brutality: 5

Story and Character: 7

Did He Deserve It?: Yes

First was back-to-back cheating retaliation scenes, now we have back-to-back nut shots. You may have forgotten that Paul Dano plays one of the dorky friends in the early 2000s teen sex comedy "The Girl Next Door," and in one quick scene, he receives quite a blow below the belt. In fencing class (maybe it's just P.E.), Emile Hirsch and Chris Marquette are in the middle of a conversation, but Dano keeps playfully hitting Marquette with his foil. Having enough of it, Marquette gets back at him with a swift smack to the groin, causing Dano to double over. Making this moment a bit funnier than the kneeing in "Cowboys & Aliens" is that it happens out of focus in the background of a shot. I'm always in favor of a background gag in a comedy. Plus, the preciseness that comes with a fencing foil I'm sure provides even more pain than just a knee. I don't have experience with that myself, but I can imagine a sword is bad news, no matter what kind.

Brutality: 7

Story and Character: 3

Did He Deserve It?: Maybe

We head back to "The Girl Next Door" for our next entry, and a moment that's a little more extreme. Emile Hirsch's character has tracked the titular girl next door (Elisha Cuthbert) to an adult film convention in Las Vegas. The trio of friends go to the convention, with Paul Dano and Chris Marquette's characters pretending to be adult film directors to talk to porn performers. When they are exposed as the high school dweebs they actually are, they are chased out of the convention, and Dano's character is pushed off a platform and falls on a table with a cake on it. He's a high school dweeb, but he doesn't deserve to take such a long fall that could cause serious injury, especially because he is being chased by a man twice his size. "The Girl Next Door" is a comedy, so of course, he just gets up and keeps running, but it looks like quite a hard fall. I am sure it was not the most fun stunt to perform. And for performers making that fall, I know they wish it would be in service of something worthy of the stunt, which this is not. It's a dumb hijinks scene, but you can't deny the impact.

Brutality: 7

Story and Character: 4

Did He Deserve It?: No

We've reached our first actual killing of Paul Dano in a film. In the movie "The King," Gael García Bernal is an ex-convict seeking out the father he never knew (William Hurt), and starts an incestuous relationship with his half-sister (Pell James). When Paul Dano's character finds out about this affair, he tries to confront Bernal about it, and Dano ends up getting stabbed and dying. While death is the ultimate result from an act of violence, the actual stabbing is not particularly visceral. It is just one stab, and Dano dies rather quickly. The act is inherently brutal but is not depicted as such. It is unceremonious as well. So, putting this in the middle of the list somewhere feels right.

Brutality: 8

Story and Character: 6

Did He Deserve It?: No

A good comedic sucker punch is always welcome in a comedic setting. It's a tried and true method for a chuckle. Two people get into a verbal altercation. Someone tries to come in and diffuse the situation and ends up getting punched in the face. This scenario brings us back to "Being Flynn." (This has to be the most anyone has ever spoken about the film "Being Flynn" since its release, right?) Anyway, the punch Paul Dano receives is swift, impactful, and makes everyone watching it deliver a wonderful, "Ooooooh." This scene is a totally solid example of Paul Dano getting beaten up, and had there been a couple more punches, it may have appeared higher. We just get to enjoy the one hit.

Brutality: 7

Story and Character: 2

Did He Deserve It?: No

In "The Batman," Paul Dano plays a serial killer who gets slightly roughed up by police. In "Okja," Paul Dano plays an animal rights activist staging a protest demonstration and is violently beaten by cops with batons. Yep ... that seems about right. Before Bong Joon-ho went on to win Oscars for his film "Parasite," he made this globetrotting "girl and her dog" movie, but the dog is instead a genetically engineered giant pig who needs rescuing from a meat plant. Paul Dano's Jay is the leader of the Animal Liberation Front (ALF) and wants to eradicate any and all mistreatment of animals. Of course, people like him will be seen as threats and targets to those in power, as their actions could hurt their bottom line and overturn the apple cart of society and business. Police work in service of those people, and they have no issue wailing on Dano's character here. It's sad how truthful this moment is to the real world, but we have seen enough footage from protests to know this is an all too common response to people who want justified change.

Brutality: 8

Story and Character: 7

Did He Deserve It?: No

It was Paul Dano's first time as the lead of a film, so of course he got a horrifying punch to the face. "L.I.E." deals in a lot of rough subject matter, such as grooming teenage boys at the hands of Brian Cox, but Paul Dano's hit comes from the fist of Bruce Altman, playing Dano's father. Early on in the film, the two get into an argument, and Altman just takes a completely uncalled for swing at Dano. The resulting black eye remains on his face for the entire rest of the picture. Dano was 15 or 16 when he shot this movie, but looks much younger. Seeing a full-grown man clobber this young boy is incredibly upsetting, and it tells you everything you need to know about the relationship those two have. (An underrated element of this punch is that it is left-handed, and I feel like we never see that in scenes like this in film. It's always righties. That's one powerful punch to a helpless kid.)

Brutality: 8

Story and Character: 8

Did He Deserve It?: No

The third and final scene from "Prisoners" kicks off the top five. Without a doubt, this is the most upsetting scene in Dano's torture, as it is the one in most full view of the audience. A lot of what happens to him in the movie is off screen or obscured, but here we just see Hugh Jackman, with saran wrap around his fist, repeatedly punching Paul Dano in the face over and over and over again until his face is a bloody, swollen mess. It doesn't help that Terrence Howard keeps propping him up so he can take another hit. When we cut back to Dano a little later to see just how swollen his face is, the prosthetics make him look more unrecognizable than Colin Farrell as The Penguin. For many, like myself, this is about when they just check out of the movie, since the scene is so brutal and unflinching, and the ultimate point the movie is trying to make doesn't really justify just how brutal it is. But if you get punched in the face that much, you must make the top five.

Brutality: 9

Story and Character: 7

Did He Deserve It?: No

I will fully admit that I had never heard of "The Good Heart" prior to making this list. Forgive me that a movie that made under $21,000 at the domestic box office did not cross my path 12 years ago. Essentially, Brian Cox (he's back!) owns a bar and takes a young homeless man, played by Paul Dano, under his wing. They meet at a hospital after Cox has a heart attack and Dano attempted suicide. Cox gives Dano a job at the bar and a place to stay with the hopes of passing the bar to Dano after he dies. Spoilers for "The Good Heart," I guess, but the film ends with Paul Dano running out of the bar to save a duck they take care of and is absolutely wrecked by a car out of nowhere, killing him. While it does not reach the absurd heights of the "Meet Joe Black" car accident, it's pretty close. I mean ... Paul Dano is chasing after a duck and gets hit by a car! What's not to love about this moment? Yes, it is supposed to be a tragic accident, but come on! A duck makes him die. Has to make the top three.

Brutality: 9

Story and Character: 7

Did He Deserve It?: No

However great that scene from "12 Years a Slave" is, there really is no other choice that could top this list than the final scene from Paul Thomas Anderson's masterpiece "There Will Be Blood." This 15-minute finale pits Daniel Day-Lewis' Daniel Plainview, who has essentially transformed into a feral animal at this point, against Paul Dano's Eli Sunday in one last bout of wills. Eli has come to Daniel for a business proposition, and Daniel has no intention of taking it seriously. First, he makes Eli emphatically deny his god and religion for his own amusement, and then the violence starts. First, he throws Eli across the room onto a bowling lane. Then he starts hurling bowling balls at him. When that does nothing, he starts throwing the pins at him. Finally, Plainview manages to hit Eli with a pin which knocks him flat on the ground. But that's not enough. Oh, no. Plainview then proceeds to bash Eli's skull with the pin until he lies dead in a pool of his own blood. He has finally triumphed, but of course, there is no satisfaction in it. He delivers the iconic final line, "I'm finished," and he just has to go on living his life, continuing to be a completely hollow and unfulfilled money monster.

In terms of Paul Dano caterwauling, it does not get better than this. There are so many yelps, and shrill tones of, "I'm your old friend!" It's a perfect performance from Dano, rightfully being utterly terrified of the gollum that is Daniel Plainview. Paul Dano has still never received an Academy Award nomination, and it will remain one of life's great mysteries as to why he was not a lock for a Best Supporting Actor nomination in 2007 for this performance. He couldn't even get Golden Globe or SAG nominations for this. Insanity. It only makes sense that his finest hour of getting the s**t beat out of him on screen would come from probably the man's best performance.

Brutality: 10

Story and Character: 10

Did He Deserve It?: Maybe

Here's to many more years of wonderful performances from Paul Dano, and many more scenes in which he gets absolutely thrashed.