This Acclaimed Stephen King Miniseries Adaptation Got A Critically Savaged Theatrical Sequel

Stephen King's "Salem's Lot" has been adapted a handful of times since the horror novel was published in 1975. The appeal is obvious: It's a classic King small-town horror tale that's also a vampire story, and a very good one at that. Indeed, "Salem's Lot" strips the titular Jerusalem's Lot of its idyllic sheen, exposing the moral crisis that plagues its residents. It centers on Ben Mears, a writer who returns to his hometown after 25 years to pen his next book, which involves a house connected to a traumatic personal experience. The house in question has been purchased by one Kurt Barlow, who fulfills the trope of the "other" while becoming the source of unimaginable horrors.

This beloved story (which also happens to be one of King's favorites) was first adapted into a two-part 1979 miniseries directed by Tobe Hooper of "The Texas Chain Saw Massacre" fame. This is arguably the best adaptation of "Salem's Lot" to date, as the 2002 "Salem's Lot" TNT miniseries starring Rob Lowe is riddled with flaws but still a lot of fun, while the 2024 Gary Dauberman movie version is a somewhat lackluster yet otherwise decent spook fest. And then there's 1987's "A Return to Salem's Lot," which is designed to act as a theatrical sequel to Hooper's miniseries. Directed by Larry Cohen ("It's Alive"), the film follows a brand new group of characters being terrorized by vampires in Jerusalem's Lot.

To say that "A Return to Salem's Lot" was critically maligned would be an understatement. Admittedly, Cohen's '80s sequel doesn't have enough critical reviews on Rotten Tomatoes to warrant an aggregate, but it does have a decidedly low 1.5 out of 10 score on Metacritic. Keeping that in mind, does Cohen's take on King's source material have any redeeming qualities?

Spoilers for "A Return to Salem's Lot" ahead.

"A Return to Salem's Lot" opens with anthropologist Joe Weber (Michael Moriarty) taking his delinquent son Jeremy (Ricky Addison Reed) to their hometown in Salem's Lot. Unfortunately, the town has been overrun by vampires that indulge in casual bloodsucking and lead an otherwise hedonistic life. Instead of getting the heck out of there, though, Joe chooses to stick around and lend his anthropological expertise to the vampiric townspeople (who apparently want him to write a religious text for them). After learning that his presumably dead Aunt Clara (June Havoc) is still alive, Joe decides to continue living among these bloodthirsty creatures ... until Jeremy starts showing signs of a troubling vampiric transition.

Between its mostly ineffectual satirical digs at consumerism and American conservatism and generally ineffective scares, "A Return to Salem's Lot" struggles to balance humor with horror. More so, the film uses the core setup of Stephen King's brilliant source material as little more than a shallow foundation for its plot. To be sure, the vampire mythos in this "Salem's Lot" follow-up is watered down to feel like a cheap gimmick, as these creatures of the night now resort to drinking cow blood in order to evade human diseases. And while these elements might've felt appropriately campy (enjoyable even) in the hands of a better filmmaker, "A Return to Salem's Lot" simply fails to do anything noteworthy with its jarring tonal switches.

"I've seen enough cows! I want to see my son!" is what Joe chooses to utter at an emotionally critical juncture in the movie. The rest of "A Return to Salem's Lot" is more of the same: a woefully tedious exercise.