Which Targaryen Kid On House Of The Dragon Is The Absolute Worst? An Investigation

If you don't already have kids, "House of the Dragon" is the type of show that could make you reconsider future parenting plans. Not only is the series largely about the perils of birthing and rearing children from day one (lest we forget that terrible c-section), but it's also increasingly about how being born into power — or born grasping for it — can make a person cruel from very early on in life. Sure, there are other factors at play here that might be making some of these Targaryen kids total a-holes, but it certainly seems like their family's fundamental dysfunction and the fight over the succession has left many of them bloodthirsty and defensive.

So who's the worst second-generation Targaryen character currently stomping around Westeros? The answer may be obvious, but there are a surprising amount of contenders. Let's run through the options to figure out — based on "House of the Dragon" alone, with no sneak peeks ahead at "Fire & Blood" — which Targaryen child is the most despicable of all.

5. Joffrey Velaryon

Look, Joffrey isn't actually a bad kid by most counts, but process of elimination dictates he must end up on this list. His half-siblings Aegon and Viserys are too young to have done anything wrong, while Daemon's older kids, Baela and Rhaena, so far seem impressively decent compared to their delightfully nasty dad. And you'd better believe Halaena Targaryen, the best bug-loving girl in all of Westeros who casually speaks in prophecies that no one bothers to write down, doesn't deserve a spot on the bad kid watchlist.

So that leaves Joffrey, the youngest of Rhaenyra's kids with Harwin Strong. So far, he's been too young to enter the fray when it comes to the bloodbath between his older siblings and his uncles, but if he's anything like his brothers, he'll possess some of the same insecurity about his lineage that has already driven them to rash actions. Most importantly though, his names is Joffrey, and even though he's named after his dad's poor, late gay lover, there's simply no way to hear it without cringing in a post-"Game of Thrones" world. I don't make the rules: any and all Joffreys earn a spot on the questionable kids list.

4. Jacaerys Velaryon

Jace (Harry Collett) is also far from the biggest stinker among the brood of boys kicking around King's Landing, but the series does seem to be laying the groundwork for some problems in his future. I know kids can be inconsiderate, but I'm already irked at the lack of trust he shows in his mom when he tells Rhaenyra they should be mourning his real father instead of Laena at the funeral. Like, we get it, you have daddy issues, but show some respect in this moment!

There's also the fact that, while he doesn't actually deal the blinding blow, Jace is who introduces a knife in the fight with Aemond. I'm never one to hold the actions of kids who don't know better against them, but it's clear that the run-in between the two sets of siblings alters the course of Westerosi history — or at least the trajectory of their relationship — forever. Bad move, Jacaerys. Weapons are dangerous!

3. Lucerys Velaryon

Like all the Velaryon kids, Lucerys hasn't shown himself quite as cruel as his white-haired counterparts yet, but he certainly took a step in a bad direction when he gouged Aemond's eye. Back then, Aemond was just a bullied kid trying to prove himself, and we hadn't seen anything sinister from him until he was backed into a corner during the fight with the Velaryon boys.

But when the fight turns dirty, leaving Luce with a broken nose, a bruised throat, and the threat of further damage, he lunges for Jace's dropped knife and leaves a huge gash in Aemond's face, ruining his eye in the process. Again, Lucerys is just a kid when all of this goes down, and may not have realized the extent of his actions, but no one I know was gouging eyes as a child during schoolyard brawls. Lucerys definitely doesn't seem evil, but I'd definitely put on some protective glasses before sitting down beside him for family dinner.

2. Aemond Targaryen

During the six year time jump between last week's episode and this one, Aemond (Ewan Mitchell) went from a bullied kid whose rage was overwhelming but somewhat understandable to a genuinely frightening villain-type who exudes menace. In case we didn't realize Aemond sucks now, Mitchell is styled like a classic anime villain, complete with a mane of long, stick-straight white hair and a black eye patch.

But he proves himself as dastardly as his stereotypical bad guy appearance quickly, when he fights Criston Cole with all the intensity of a cold-blooded sadist. Later, he gives a toast at family dinner that doubles as a taunt, pointing out that the Velaryon kids aren't legitimate just hours after Daemon sliced someone's head in two for doing the same. He's growing cocky, and seems thirsty for blood. When a fight breaks out at the dinner table, Aemond seems thrilled. Judging by the looks he throws like daggers, he's also growing pretty tired of his Uncle Daemon.

1.Aegon Targaryen

If you told me Aegon Targaryen (Tom Glynn-Carney) was the first incarnation of the demon that would later respawn as Joffrey Lannister, I'd believe you. This guy sucks. He's been a terror since we first met him, naked and perched in a windowsill, but he's only gotten exponentially worse since then. He constantly antagonizes everyone around him, and does so from a place of obvious misogyny.

He seems to see women as objects to be messed with, and men as inferiors to be mocked. Even before he committed an act of sexual violence this week that clearly seemed to be the latest in a long line of them, he was calling his sister names, sowing violence among his brothers and nephews, and just generally being a total pile of flaming garbage. Callous, cruel, and self-centered, Aegon truly seems to see the world as a game — one that's only fun for him if other people are having a terrible time.