Game of Thrones superlatives

First, we ranked the 10 best episodes of Game of Thrones. Then we ranked the 15 best moments from the series. Now, it’s time get serious. It’s time for some Game of Thrones superlatives.

It makes sense, right? After all, the treacherous world of Westeros is just like high school. What is the battle for the crown if not the grandest popularity contest imaginable? So the Westerosi yearbook editors (Jacob Hall and Ben Pearson) are awarding the currently-living characters the accolades they deserve while they still draw breath. Who’s the best dressed? Who is the life of the party? Who is most likely to be eaten by a dragon? Let’s find out.

Note: Before you wonder “Why did they make these decisions?”, Ben and Jacob have you covered. They recorded an entire podcast episode where they hashed out their personal lists and debated what should make the final cut. You can listen to it here.

Tyrion Lannister Game of Thrones

Life of the Party — Tyrion Lannister

He’s said it himself: he drinks and he knows things. Is there anyone in Westeros you’d like to kick back with more than Tyrion? Imagine the stories, the jokes, the speeches – when this guy walks in, you know the party is about to really begin. (Ben Pearson)

game of thrones character posters

Most Likely to End Up on the Iron Throne — Daenerys Targaryen

Dany’s had her eye on the prize for her entire adult life, and she’s been sharpening her leadership skills on the long journey to King’s Landing. Author George R.R. Martin has described his planned ending to this grand story as “bittersweet,” and I can’t think of a more bittersweet conclusion than Dany finally taking her place on the Iron Throne after losing several of her closest friends – and maybe even a lover? – in a massive battle against the Night King. (Ben Pearson)

Most Likely to Be Doublecrossed — Jon Snow

“You know nothing, Jon Snow.” Yes, that remains true. While he may not actually be Ned Stark’s bastard son, he is still a Stark man through and through, which means he’s gullible and naive and just waiting to have someone stab a sharp and shiny blade through his back. (Jacob Hall)

Most Likely to Doublecross — Cersei Lannister

The season 7 finale, which saw virtually every character on the show agreeing to put aside petty conflicts to save the realm from the undead apocalypse, also featured Queen Cersei planning to screw everyone over. Never close your eyes around her. Never be alone in a room with her. (Jacob Hall)

Most Likely to Be Eaten by a Dragon — Euron Greyjoy

Think about the stupid face Euron would make right before he’s chomped to bits. Super satisfying, right? I’m holding out hope that this moron gets his just desserts by becoming a meal for Drogon or Rhaegal. Hell, I’d even enjoy watching him be eaten by the ice zombie version of Viserion. (Ben Pearson)

Best Dressed Game of Thrones

Most Stylish, His and Hers — Jaime Lannister and Sansa Stark

Not every person looks good in medieval fantasy garb, but Jaime Lannister has turned leather and armor into a bonafide fashion statement. And ever since Sansa Stark left the south and returned to Winterfell, she’s been rocking the northern look like a boss. The latter gets bonus points for also making her own outfits, unlike certain dragon queens who have an entire team to assist with their wardrobe. (Jacob Hall)

Most Talented — Brienne of Tarth

Brienne of Tarth has been a warrior since childhood, when she was cruelly picked on by bullies who made fun of her appearance. But after years of training, she’s become one of the best sword fighters in all of Westeros. Who’s laughing now? (Ben Pearson)

Most Cunning — Varys

The smartest man in Westeros (and Essos, for that matter), Varys knows what you ate for breakfast, knows what you’ll eat for lunch, and will have your downfall ready in time for dinner. No one outsmarts him and no one outwits him unless he chooses to put himself out there. And even then, he has a back-up plan. (Jacob Hall)

Game of Thrones season 7 trailer

Most Evil — The Night King

Game of Thrones has spent seven years humanizing most of its villains, dividing our loyalties as we learn about the broken souls lurking in the likes of Cersei Lannister and Sandor Clegane. But the Night King? He’s just pure, icy villainy, marching south because he must. You can’t top that. (Jacob Hall)

Most Devoted Family Member — Samwell Tarly

Samwell Tarly’s father treated him like garbage, so Sam ended up making his own family with Gilly and Little Sam. For years, Sam has had only two goals: protect Gilly and Little Sam, and learn as much as he can about the threat to the North so he can help Jon Snow save Westeros. He might be the closest thing Westeros has to a classic family man. (Ben Pearson)

Worst Family Member — Davos

Ol’ Davos Seaworth, on the other hand, he’s a different story entirely. I feel slightly bad for him because he lost his son in the Battle of Blackwater, but it’s hard to be totally sympathetic because the damn Onion Knight also seems to have COMPLETELY FORGOTTEN about his own wife (!), whom he hasn’t seen or even mentioned in literal years. Not cool, man. (Ben Pearson)

Most Likely to Start a Band — Bronn

You may not know this, but actor Jerome Flynn was once part of a U.K. pop duo. Seriously. We actually get to hear Bronn the sellsword’s impressive pipes in “Blackwater,” when he leads a group of Lannister soldiers in a drunken singalong, and again when he sings “The Dornishman’s Wife” to the Sand Snakes in season 5. Give the man some back-up musicians and let him tour the Seven Kingdoms already. (Jacob Hall)

Podrick Payne Game of Thrones v2

Most Likely to Take Over the Brothel Industry — Podrick Payne

Podrick Payne had a, uh, memorable first experience in a King’s Landing brothel early in the series, but I’d love for him to survive the battle in the North, come back to the capital, and take over for Littlefinger, treating his employees with the respect, sweetness, and loyalty he’s shown Brienne of Tarth during their time on the road together. (Ben Pearson)

Most Likely to Win in a Sword Fight — Arya Stark

Jaime Lannister lost his hand. Ned Stark is dead. Jon Snow and Brienne of Tarth are too honorable to win the nastiest fights. So that leaves Arya, our favorite assassin, who is not above fighting in the dirtiest ways possible to get the job done. No one ever sees her coming. (Jacob Hall)

Most Likely to Die By Freezing to Death — Grey Worm

Have you seen this dude’s outfits? I feel like he’s spent a lot of time without sleeves, so it may be tough for him to adapt to that harsh Northern weather. Grey Worm is a stellar fighter, but I’m not so sure he has the wardrobe necessary to last very long up there. (Ben Pearson)

Most Likely to Join the Army of the Dead — Bran Stark

What is even left of Bran Stark at this point? His transformation into the Three-Eyed Raven has seemingly stripped him of personality and maybe even his humanity. So what’s stopping this psychic powerhouse from suddenly deciding that the living are beneath him and swapping sides? Keep an eye on this guy. (Jacob Hall)

Most Likely to Kill Cersei — Arya

Granted, Arya has a long distance to traverse in order to accomplish this. But damn it, Cersei’s name has been on her list ever since that incident with Joffrey and Arya’s pal back in season one, which led to Arya being forced to drive Nymeria away to save her direwolf’s life. Cersei has it coming, and since Arya couldn’t kill Joffrey herself, she just might be able to cross his mother’s name off her list before the final credits roll. (Ben Pearson)

Most Likely to Take the Black — Jorah Mormont

Two scenarios. Jon Snow becomes king and decides that the man who his father had previously exiled doesn’t have a place in his new kingdom, so he gets sent to the Wall. Or: Jorah realizes that Daenerys no longer needs him and willingly takes the black to take over for his late father and try to live up to his legacy. Either way, Jorah’s destiny lies north. (Jacob Hall)

Most Likely to Return from the Dead — Sandor Clegane

The Hound has come close to death already, but I can easily imagine a scenario in which he dies on the battlefield and then an undead version of him faces off against Arya, technically giving her a chance to cross his name off her list, too. It’s poetic, but is Game of Thrones interested in being that cute in its final season? We’ll see. (Ben Pearson)

Best Beard — Tormund Giantsbane

C’mon. No one else stood a chance here. (Jacob Hall)

Jaqen H'ghar Game of Thrones

Best Instagram Stories — Jaqen H’ghar

If Instagram existed in this fantasy world, who would have the best stories? It’s gotta be Jaqen H’ghar, because his Faceless Man shenanigans would always ensure that he’s showing off new scenarios, fresh faces, and things would never get repetitive. Except the killings. Might get a bit sick of those after a while. (Ben Pearson)

Game of Thrones Season 7 Episode 7

Most Likely to Be an Obnoxious YouTube Commenter — Theon Greyjoy

When you’ve endured what Theon Greyjoy has endured, you have to work out your anger in some way. And what better way to do that than troll the comments sections, saying snide and vicious things for the sake of it? Theon is often useless on the battlefield and in the war room, but give him some anonymity and he’ll become as nasty as The Mountain. (Jacob Hall)

Qyburn Game of Thrones

Most Likely to Share a Fake News Story on Facebook — Qyburn

Qyburn, the weirdest non-maester this side of the Citadel, can scheme with the best of them. And I imagine if Facebook existed in this world, he’d be purposefully spreading fake information to sow discord in Westeros, taking any opportunity to create distractions so he can execute his creepy plans in the shadows. (Ben Pearson)

Missandei and Grey Worm

Cutest Couple — Missandei and Grey Worm

This may be the most sensitive romantic relationship in the entire series, and as Jacob pointed out during our podcast discussion about this topic, their eventual sex scene is one of the few times the show feels genuinely sexy. The way they look at each other, they way they passionately care about each other, Grey Worm’s story about how he grew up without fear and now he fears life without Missandei…it’s all just so damn sweet. (Ben Pearson)

Person You Want Most in Your Corner — Davos Seaworth

Here’s a man so devoted to your cause that he’ll win Worst Family Member for you. He’ll argue for you in front of the Iron Bank’s board when you’re too uncharismatic to make your own case. He’ll pull a sword to defend your dead body within hours of meeting you. Davos doesn’t even have time for Davos. He only has time to prop you up and be the best ally possible. Thanks, Davos. (Jacob Hall)

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Game of Thrones season 8 premieres on HBO this Sunday, April 14, 2019.

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