29 Alternative Christmas Movies That Aren't Die Hard

The holiday season is upon us, and I don't know about you, but I've always found something melancholy about this time of year. Perhaps it's because the holidays signal that another year has ended. Perhaps it's because the weather gets colder, cutting into your bones. Perhaps it's because there are approximately three hours of sunlight before impenetrable darkness sets in. I don't know. None of that is to say I don't like Christmas. No, despite the sadness, I do enjoy this time of year. I enjoy the festivities, and the lights, and the excuse to self-medicate with alcohol. And I enjoy the movies. I don't just mean the obvious traditional Christmas movies, either. No, I'm talking about the wonderful world of alternative Christmas movies. Movies that are set during this time of year that also happen to be dark, or bleak, or violent, or scary. Movies that say, "Unfortunate things happen all the time – even on Christmas." 

At this point in time, I think it's safe to say the most popular, well-known alternative Christmas movie is "Die Hard." You know it, I know it. And I'm not slagging on "Die Hard" here, oh no. "Die Hard" is a great movie! I even like "Die Hard 2" because it feels a bit more Christmas-y, what with the snow and the crowded airport and so on. But since "Die Hard" is so well established as an alternative Christmas movie at this point, it felt kind of silly to put it on a list. Because I don't need to tell you about "Die Hard," right? I mean ... you get it. However, if the absence of "Die Hard" on this list really bugs you, you have my permission to pretend it's here! And only you can see it! Because you are special, dear reader. 

With that out of the way, take a stroll with me now through the weird, wonderful world of alternative Christmas movies. The type of Christmas movies that remind you of struggling into your winter coat and walking down dark city streets where buildings and trees are decked out with cold, twinkling lights. Movies that have the vibes of hangovers; loneliness; exhaustion. And, yes, there will be little joy thrown in for good measure, too. Happy Holidays, folks. Here's to (hopefully) better days ahead. 

Stanley Kubrick's final film has become a bonafide Christmas classic in my house. It's somewhat crazy to think that Kubrick's "Eyes Wide Shut" hit theaters in July, because it's such a Christmasy movie that the thought of watching it during the summer feels like sacrilege. There's an online claim that there's a Christmas tree in every scene of this film – that's not technically true, but brightly lit Tannenbaums are definitely all over this joint. A psychosexual adventure into one very long, long Christmastime night, "Eyes Wide Shut" has Tom Cruise as an insecure doctor who stalks out to see a patient after his wife (Nicole Kidman) reveals that she once considered having an affair. She didn't have an affair, mind you. But the confession that she considered it is enough to send Cruise's character into a cuckold crisis. He travels from one location to the next and eventually ends up at a mask-filled orgy. Doesn't that sound like Christmas? 

This Technicolor dream from Douglas Sirk starts in autumn and gives way to snowy Christmas. The story follows lonely widow Cary Scott (Jane Wyman), who finds herself falling for Ron (Rock Hudson), a younger man who works as an arborist. Cary is from the rich upper-class while Ron is firmly working class, and a relationship between such clashing classes is a huge no-no in Cary's circle of snobby, upper-crust friends. Even Cary's grown children disapprove of the romance, worrying about what it will do to their social status. Lush with gorgeous colors, complete with shots of frosty blue ice crusting against huge picture windows as fireplaces roar, there's something cozy built into this wonderful melodrama that should be seasonal viewing for everyone who loves good movies. 

Billy Wilder's "The Apartment" is a comedy, a drama, a love story, and a rather lonely little Christmas (and New Years') movie. Office drone Jack Lemmon is such a pushover that he lets his bosses use his apartment as a love nest for their affairs. Then he meets elevator operator Shirley MacLaine and, understandably, grows smitten. Unfortunately, Maclaine's character is in a relationship with Lemmon's direct boss, played by Fred MacMurray. Full of shots of blackened New York streets during Christmas, and including a boozy Christmas party blow-out, "The Apartment" is a holiday movie for lovelorn losers everywhere. 

A Wong Kar-wai Christmas movie? Yes, it exists! "2046" is a sequel of sorts to the filmmaker's "In the Mood for Love," and once again checks in with Chow Mo-wan, the character played by Tony Leung. Chow is still pining for Su Li-zhen (Maggie Cheung), but he's also become something of a ladies' man, moving from one beautiful woman to the next. In the midst of all this, the film also cuts to scenes set in the future involving a speeding train and beautiful robot women. These sci-fi elements are part of a sci-fi novel Chow wrote, but they blend in with the "real" storyline as things cut back and forth. The passage of years is marked by several different Christmas Eves, and while there's only one scene that actually features Christmas paraphernalia, the loneliness of the holiday comes through, rendered gorgeously via cinematography from Christopher Doyle, Lai Yiu-fai, and Kwan Pun-leung. 

There are multiple "Black Christmas" movies at this point, but we're only going to talk about the first, and best, one for the purposes of this list. Before "Halloween" turned a holiday into a slasher movie, "Black Christmas" tormented some sorority sisters during the Christmas season. Obscene prank phone calls give way to gruesome murders, all while the snow piles up and blood-red Christmas lights glow. And, amusingly enough, the filmmaker responsible for this film, Bob Clark, is also responsible for directing another Christmas classic: "A Christmas Story." 

The second Rooney Mara movie on the list! David Fincher's "The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo" hit theaters during Christmas, and the marketing played that up by calling it the "feel bad movie of Christmas." They weren't joking, either: this is a nasty movie not for the squeamish. And, appropriately enough, the story begins during the Christmas holiday, where disgraced journalist Daniel Craig is hired to look into a mystery involving a wealthy family. Eventually, he joins forces with troubled hacker Rooney Mara, and the two find themselves walking in a bloody winter wonderland. 

Honestly, I could probably fill this list out with Shane Black movies, but here's one more for good measure. "The Long Kiss Goodnight" is a funny, violent bit of pulp featuring Geena Davis as a woman with amnesia who suddenly remembers she used to be a trained assassin. She teams up with a low-rent private eye played by Samuel L. Jackson, and the two of them get embroiled in a plot involving lots and lots of gunfire, all set around the backdrop of Christmas. Nothing says "Happy Holidays!" quite like Geena Davis yelling "Die screaming, mother f***er!" as she murders some dude. 

James Ellroy's sprawling noir story "L.A. Confidential" was turned into what I think is safe to call a masterpiece in 1997. Kicking off with a bloody police station beat-down on Christmas Eve, "L.A. Confidential" follows a group of cops working a case involving murder, corruption, and a prostitution ring. Sounds festive, right? Directed by Curtis Hanson, who also penned the script with Brian Helgeland, "L.A. Confidential" is a meticulously crafted piece of pulp (although, fair warning, the film does feature Kevin Spacey in a prominent role, so it might not play as well with some viewers now as it did back in '97). 

If you thought spending the holidays with your in-laws was hell, wait until you see what happened to Princess Diana. Kristen Stewart gives the best performance of her career so far playing the doomed princess, who struggles to survive three days during Christmas with the Royal Family. Diana is on the verge of a nervous breakdown, and her cold family-by-marriage certainly doesn't help things. Dreamy, ghostly, and full of ornate Christmas scenery, "Spencer" is already on its way to being a new holiday classic. 

In Whit Stillman's chilly "Metropolitan," wealthy college kids come home from the holidays and go from one fancy party to the next. That doesn't sound like the most thrilling scenario, but Stillman's crackling script finds a way to make it all gel, telling the story primarily through the eyes of an outsider; a middle-class kid who ends up joining this group of rich kids almost by accident. This is yet another film that perfectly captures how lonely Christmas can feel, complete with the traditional TV Yule Log burning in the background at one point. "It's sort of a symbol of loneliness," Stillman said of that TV Yule Log. "It probably wasn't a great Christmas for you if you were watching it."

This truly deranged French film from 1989 focuses on a little rich kid who has to protect his house from a lunatic dressed as Santa Claus. The kid, who is something of a genius, proceeds to build a bunch of booby-traps to fight the evil Santa. Remember: this film about a kid using booby-traps to stop a home invader on Christmas came out in 1989, a full year before "Home Alone." That's not to say this is similar to "Home Alone," though. For one thing, the violence here isn't cartoony – it's bloody. There's also a dog death, which is enough to keep me from ever watching this again. Still, if you're on the prowl for a tasteless holiday treat, you'll likely want to stuff this movie in your stocking. 

It's Christmas Eve, and Satan is coming to Madrid. Álex de la Iglesia's wacky horror-comedy "The Day of the Beast" has a priest, a death metal enthusiast, and a phony psychic teaming up to prevent the birth of the Antichrist. Since Satan has a sense of humor, he's planning for his hellspawn to be born on Christmas Day. In order to help find the devil, the priest, played by Álex Angulo, decides to start sinning as much as possible – he steals, pushes people down, brutally assaults people, and more, all in the name of tricking the Prince of Darkness. But Satan isn't easily fooled, and he doesn't like being trifled with. The tone of this thing is all over the place, violently careening from over-the-top humor to cruel brutality, and that certainly sounds Christmasy, doesn't it?

Family get-togethers are a big part of Christmas, and, more often than not, they can descend into anarchy. That's certainly the case in "The Lion in Winter," Anthony Harvey's 1968 film adapted from the play of the same name. It's Christmastime, and the aging King Henry II (Peter O'Toole) is gearing up to name one of his sons as successor. In the spirit of the holiday, Henry has allowed his estranged wife Eleanor of Aquitaine (Katharine Hepburn) out of prison to spend time with the family. But when Henry and the fam get together, the scheming begins, with everyone out for themselves. Featuring tons of witty, bitter banter and a killer Katharine Hepburn performance. 

"Inside" is definitely not the Christmas movie to put on for the whole family, unless your whole family is really into insanely over-the-top violence. It's Christmas Eve, and a pregnant woman (Alysson Paradis) is targeted by a crazy stranger (Béatrice Dalle) who has invaded her home with the intent of cutting her unborn baby out of the womb. Buckets of blood are spilled in the process, so much so that the sheer brutality of it all starts to seem almost comical. Almost.