What We Do In The Shadows Season 3 Teasers Suggest Kickball Teams Are Delicious

The season 3 premiere of "What We Do in the Shadows" is fast-approaching, and to tide you over until that September 2 airdate, FX has released two clips teasing the fall episodes of everyone's favorite vampire mockumentary series.

One of these clips involves a lot of cursive diary-writing, with references to a Staten Island "adult kickball team," which may have suffered an untoward fate at the hands of the show's three vampire roommates, Nandor the Relentless (Kayvan Novak), Laszlo Cravensworth (Matt Berry), and Nadja (Natasia Demetriou). The other clip suggests that we may be seeing a game of vampire thrones, as it were, in season 3 of "What We Do in the Shadows."

Alas, Laszlo's Pennsylvania persona, Jackie Daytona, won't be making an appearance this season, so seeing him on the sidelines of girls' volleyball games would appear to be off the table. What's on the table mentally in vampire goblets (but offscreen in this first clip) is the blood of dodgeball players.

"Dear diary, Gizmo really outdid himself with a selection of human bodies to feast upon tonight." Apparently, the three vampires have consumed eight pineapple-eating virgins, which begs the question: how'd they divide the blood of those last two virgins among themselves? Was there a measuring cup involved?

These are the kinds of questions the show needs to explore. The funny thing about "What We Do in the Shadows" is ... it doesn't always show what they really do in the shadows. What about their human victims?

Watch the Vampire Throne

"What We Do in the Shadows" season 2 ended with the aforementioned Gizmo, more commonly known as Guillermo (Harvey Guillén), vanquishing a theater full of vampires. As you can see in the second clip, above, this has left a power vacuum in the Vampiric Council, which Nandor, Laszlo, and Nadja are all too happy to fill. The only problem is, there are three of them and only one seat of power.

Nandor's question, "Is there not a throne for all of us?" leaves The Guide (Kristen Schaal) cackling. Since there can only be one supreme leader, it looks like "What We Do in the Shadows" season 3 will be pitting the three roomies and their resident D'Artagnan, the energy vampire, Colin Robinson (Mark Proksch), against each other. No doubt, hilarious hijinks will ensue.

Next year marks the 100th anniversary of the oldest surviving Dracula movie, F.W. Murnau's "Nosferatu: A Symphony of Horror." That was one of the titles, this week, on our list of the 12 Best Vampire Movies of All Time, as was Taika Waititi and Jemaine Clement's 2014 "What We Do in the Shadows" film, which, of course, has since spun off into the "What We Do in the Shadows" TV series. Since said series has already been renewed for a fourth season in 2022, we can look forward to celebrating the vampire movie century next year with Nandor, Laszlo, and Nadja.

"What We Do in the Shadows" season 3 premieres on FX on Thursday, September 2, 2021.