The Love Guru Is All Over The Razzie Nominations Like A Bad Case Of The Pox

Published today are the finalised list of nominations for the Golden Raspberries, or Razzies. As ever, they've been announced the day before the Oscars but, this time, they contain a film I'd say is better in many respects than some of those we can expect to see heralded by the Academy.

That film would be M. Night Shyamalan's The Happening, nominated for worst picture, director, screenplay and actor. Surely this is ludicrous? Indeed, I reckon the screenplay is really pretty good and Shyamalan made some very strong decisions in his directing of the film – so, of course, those two nominations don't add up to me. Therefore, I'd also argue it surely can't therefore be labelled as one of the worst films of the year. Most disappointing? Sure. I think was the most disappointing, bar none. A real 5 out of 10 film, but not Razzie-worthy by any measure.

5 Nominations: Worst Picture, Actor, Actress, Supporting Actor (2x) Director and Screenplay

Sad, really, because Myers has talent and charm. I think we'll see him redeem himself at least a little with his role in Tarantino's Inglourious Basterds. It's a very small role but if he plays it right, he'll be back in my good books.

The genuine dreck of the year make up most of the rest of the list. Meet the Spartans, The Hottie or the Nottie and Disaster Movie are all deeply cynical, condescending pieces of exploitation. If big money Lotteries are taxes on the poor, these films are the daylight robbery of the disdvantaged and arrested. To buy a ticket to one of these films is to nurture a cultural cancer.

I feel sorry for the cast and crew employed on these projects, trapped between the temptation to turn in lazy work and just cash the cheque, or to bust a gut over something that doesn't deserve them or their time just to prove they can do nicely, and to bolster their CVs.

Nominated for one award, in the category of Worst Prequel, Remake, Rip-Off or Sequel, was Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. Personally, I'd have put that one in almost every category letting only the actors off the hook. I consider it no more than a shameful mess – but then, I never really liked any of the series. How do you feel about Skull now, having had some time to reflect?

I don't think there are really any films missing that should have been on the list – at least not from US wide releases – but I do know which films infuriated me more last year. If I had to name just one, I think I'd plump for W.

That film drove me nuts. And, no, that's not at all on the basis of its politics. On the basis of the filmmaking. Full nominations listed below:

Worst Picture NominationsDisaster Movie & Meet the Spartans (double nominee from the same writer-directors)The HappeningThe Hottie & The NottieIn the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege TaleThe Love GuruWorst Actor Nominations

Larry the Cable Guy, Witless Protection

Eddie Murphy, Meet Dave

Mike Myers, The Love Guru

Al Pacino, 88 Minutes & Righteous Kill

Mark Wahlberg, The Happening & Max Payne

Worst Actress Nominations

Jessica Alba, The Eye & The Love Guru

The cast of The Women (Annette Bening, Eva Mendes, Debra Messing, Jada Pinkett-Smith, and Meg Ryan)

Cameron Diaz, What Happens in Vegas

Paris Hilton, The Hottie & The Nottie

Kate Hudson, Fool's Gold & My Best Friend's Girl

Worst Supporting Actor Nominations

Uwe Boll (as himself), Uwe Boll's Postal

Pierce Brosnan, Mamma Mia!

Ben Kingsley, The Love Guru & War, Inc. & The Wackness

Burt Reynolds, Deal & In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale

Verne Troyer, The Love Guru & Uwe Boll's Postal

Worst Supporting Actress Nominations

Carmen Electra, Disaster Movie & Meet the Spartans

Paris Hilton, Repo! The Genetic Opera

Kim Kardashian, Disaster Movie

Jenny McCarthy, Witless Protection

Leelee Sobieski, 88 Minutes & In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale

Worst Screen Couple Nominations

Uwe Boll and any Actor, Camera, or Screenplay

Cameron Diaz and Ashton Kutcher, What Happens in Vegas

Paris Hilton and either Christine Lakin or Joel David Moore, The Hottie and the Nottie

Larry the Cable Guy and Jenny McCarthy, Witless Protection

Eddie Murphy and Eddie Murphy, Meet Dave

Worst Prequel, Remake, Rip-Off, or Sequel NominationsThe Day the Earth Blowed Up Real GoodDisaster Movie and Meet the SpartansIndiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal SkullSpeed RacerStar Wars: The Clone WarsWorst Director Nominations

Uwe Boll, 1968: Tunnel Rats, In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale and Uwe Boll's Postal

Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer, Disaster Movie and Meet the Spartans

Tom Putnam, The Hottie & the Nottie

Marco Schnabel, The Love Guru

M. Night Shyamalan, The Happening

Worst Screenplay NominationsDisaster Movie and Meet the SpartansThe HappeningThe Hottie and the NottieIn the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege TaleThe Love GuruWorst Career Achievement

Uwe Boll