This Banned Sesame Street Spoof Movie Is Still Impossible To Watch Today

Over the last 50 years, "Sesame Street" has taught children all over the world the fundamentals of life with their colorful cast of muppets. They've taught kids how to count, how to show compassion, and how to solve conflicts without fighting, and everything in between. But one of the most important things "Sesame Street" has taught us all, young and old, is how to love. Every character who lives on Sesame Street loves each other very much, but how much they love each other has been an ever-present subject of speculation and, unfortunately, controversy.

The question of which muppets love each other shouldn't be controversial. After all, Kermit and Miss Piggy got married and divorced, but despite how much they've hogged the spotlight, the most controversial relationship in "Sesame Street" is whatever is going on in Bert and Ernie's apartment.

The two roommates are considered one of the best odd couples in TV history, with fun-loving Ernie often driving sourpuss Bert to his wits end, and their very close relationship has been the source of controversy from conservatives who baselessly accuse the show of indoctrinating kids with radical leftist concepts like "diversity" and "compassion."

The question of whether Bert and Ernie are a couple has been a hot topic for years, and the short film "Ernest and Bertram" dove headfirst into this tabloid fodder and paid the consequences for it.

The short opens with Ernie coming home to find Bert in despair over a series of tabloid headlines accusing the pair of being more than just "roommates." The two grapple with what their relationship truly is, producing laughs through the juxtaposition of their heartfelt conversation and the costume's rigid lack of emotion. If this sounds like a film coasting on cheap gay panic shock value, know that it's not just a parody of "Sesame Street." It's also an adaptation of "The Children's Hour" by playwright Lillian Hellman, which tells the story of two female teachers whose lives fall apart when they are accused of being lovers.

"Ernest and Bertram" was one of the most talked about films at the 2002 Sundance Film Festival, but with the attention came a cease and desist notice from the Sesame Workshop, which produces the show, who were unhappy that the film eagerly uses their copyrighted characters. The film was allowed to have a final public screening at Outfest, the Los Angeles gay and lesbian film festival, before being locked away forever, only able to be watched on a very poor quality upload on YouTube.

While this was a 100% unofficial story of what goes on inside Bert and Ernie's apartment when they're not teaching kids about colors and shapes, in 2018, we got new insights from veteran "Sesame Street" writer Mark Saltzman. Saltzman confirmed that, when he wrote for the characters for over 15 years, he brought in many elements from his own same sex relationship:

"I remember one time that a column from The San Francisco Chronicle, a preschooler in the city turned to mom and asked "are Bert & Ernie lovers?" And that, coming from a preschooler was fun. And that got passed around, and everyone had their chuckle and went back to it. And I always felt that without a huge agenda, when I was writing Bert & Ernie, they were. I didn't have any other way to contextualize them."

Sesame Workshop for their part quickly issued a rebuttal that muppets "do not have a sexual orientation." But that leads us to ask the question: Is Kermit and Miss Piggy's marriage a sham? Or did "Ernest and Bertram" hit too close to home for Sesame Workshop?