friday the 13th part 2

100. Redoing the Exterior

The Film: Friday the 13th Part IV: The Final Chapter

The Victim: Terri

The Gory Details: What sounds basic on paper is elevated in execution. Terry is impaled against the side of a house with a spear, but only after what looks like a POV shot glides past the victim, setting the stage for much of the murder to take place in shadows cast against the wall.

99. Do You Require Roadside Assistance?

The Film: Friday the 13th Part V: A New Beginning

The Victim: Vinnie

The Gory Details: I’m not sure if having a road flare shoved in your mouth would be enough kill you all on its own, but it sure looks like it hurts and anything that doesn’t involve a machete or an axe is a welcome change of pace by this point.

98. Kia, Killed in Action

The Film: Freddy vs. Jason

The Victim: Kia

The Gory Details: The use of a homophobic slur and some of that lousy early ’00s faux slow-motion knock this otherwise gnarly death down a few spots. Kia steps in to distract Freddy Krueger, only for Jason to approach her from behind and transform her into a homerun ball with his machete, sending her flying into a nearby tree.

97. Death by Party Horn

The Film: Friday the 13th Part VII: The New Blood

The Victim: Kate

The Gory Details: Yes, Jason Voorhees stabs someone to death with a party horn. This is a thing that happens in a motion picture made by humans. But hey, at least they were finding ways to keep this stuff fresh.

96. The Texas Chainsaw Effect

The Film: Friday the 13th (2009)

The Victim: Bree

The Gory Details: Jason, doing his best Leatherface impression, impales Bree on a set of antlers. Effective, if somewhat familiar, stuff.

95. Yes, He is Killing You

The Film: Friday the 13th Part IV: The Final Chapter

The Victim: Rob

The Gory Details: After spending the bulk of the movie preparing to avenge his sister (killed in Friday the 13th Part 2), Rob Dier’s first proper encounter in Jason ends quickly as the masked killer decimates him with a garden claw. Noteworthy for Rob screaming “He’s killing me!” as Jason does him in, a weird (and weirdly human) thing to say as someone kills you.

94. Where’d You Get Those Peepers?

The Film: Friday the 13th Part V: A New Beginning

The Victim: Tina

The Gory Details: Tina getting a pair of garden shears in the eyes is unpleasant enough, but this one ranks because of the sick crunch we hear when faux-Jason finishes the job.

93. Rock On, J.J.

The Film: Friday the 13th Part VIII: Jason Takes Manhattan

The Victim: J.J.

The Gory Details: As I’ve said before, any death that gives Jason something new to work with is something worth celebrating. So J.J. getting beaten to death with her own electric guitar after deciding that the filthy engine room of a cruise liner was the best place to rock out stands out.

92. Don’t Go Losing Your Head

The Film: Freddy vs. Jason

The Victim: Mr. Mueller

The Gory Details: Blake wakes up and nudges his father. Dear ol’ dad’s head falls right off. Points for comedy!

91-90. Be Prepared…but Die Anyway

The Film: Friday the 13th Part VI: Jason Lives

The Victims: Lizbeth and Darren

The Gory Details: A decade before Scream, Lizbeth and Darren (the latter played by Scandal‘s Tony Goldwyn!), showcase some keen genre knowledge when they see Jason, recognize that he’s a walking horror trope, and attempt to escape before they get murdered. They both end up getting impaled with a fence post, but “A” for effort.

89. An Ungrateful Space Jason

The Film: Jason X

The Victim: Professor Lowe

The Gory Details: Eventually, Professor Lowe gets decapitate offscreen and his severed head gets thrown around as a prop in other scenes. But first, he attempts to bargain with his killer, offering to give him his machete back if that’s what it will take to end his rampage. It’s preposterous, but oh-so-fun.

88. Should’ve Just Stayed Down

The Film: Friday the 13th Part III

The Victim: Ali

The Gory Details: Biker gang leader Ali find himself in a rare position: he’s attacked by Jason Voorhees and lives to tell the tale. But rather than just play dead or flee, he leaps back into action during the climax and promptly gets his arm chopped off. And then Jason spends a good thirty seconds hacking him up.

87. The Improper Use of a Medical Instrument

The Film: Friday the 13th Part IV: The Final Chapter

The Victim: Nurse Morgan

The Gory Details: While there’s nothing here we haven’t seen before, the death of Nurse Morgan via a scalpel to the guts is well-staged and well-executed. If every “boring” kill was this effective, this series would be in a better place.

86. Just Another Day in New York City

The Film: Friday the 13th Part VIII: Jason Takes Manhattan

The Victim: Mr. McCulloch

The Gory Details: Mr. McCulloch, the pompous biology teacher, is drowned in a barrel of green toxic waste (complete with a dead floating rat) that just-so-happens to be sitting in the alley where Jason confronts him. You know, a pretty standard New York City murder. Nothing special about this one!

85. All Tied Up

The Film: Friday the 13th

The Victim: Brenda

The Gory Details: The first Friday the 13th differs from most of its sequels in that it values suspense as much as gore and Brenda’s implied offscreen death (by bow and arrow) is pretty tense! Her tied-up corpse is later tossed through a window, supplying the series with one of its better jump scares.

84-83. Lesson Learned: Don’t Help People

The Film: Friday the 13th Part V: A New Beginning

The Victim: Dr. Letter and George

The Gory Details: Dr. Letter operates a camp for wayward youths, helping troubled teens learn to overcome their problems and work with society. George works for him. Both of them are brutally murdered, with the former impaled to a tree with a railroad spike and the latter thrown through a window with his eyes gouged out. Moral of the story: don’t dedicate your life to helping others or you’ll just be bodies waiting to be discovered during the slasher movie climax.

82. Red Water Rafting

The Film: Friday the 13th Part IV: The Final Chapter

The Victim: Samantha

The Gory Details: Boats are scary enough, so how about a boat made entirely out of material that can be sliced up by even an amateur murderer? Anyway, rafts are scary as shit and they offer Samantha no protection when Jason stabs her through the bottom of her inflating water device.

81. The Uselessness of Tents

The Film: Jason Goes to Hell: The Final Friday

The Victim: Deborah

The Gory Details: Of all the people to die while having sex in the Friday the 13th series, Deborah’s demise is…one of them! Well, it’s actually pretty good and one of the high points of the worst movie in the series, as she is impaled through the tent and torn in half with a quick upward thrust.

80. Mean Girl Makes Fetch Happen

The Film: Friday the 13th Part VII: The New Blood

The Victim: Melissa

The Gory Details: One of the meanest mean girls in the entire series, Melissa takes an axe in the face before her lifeless body is tossed across the room like a sack of potatoes. It works much better in context, where her demise should be met with healthy cheers from everyone watching.

79. Sting Like a Bee

The Film: Friday the 13th Part VIII: Jason Takes Manhattan

The Victim: Julius

The Gory Details: We first meet Julius as he’s destroying an opponent in a boxing match, so surely he’s a physical match for a towering zombie hillbilly serial killer, right? After punching Jason in the face for about two minutes, an out-of-breath Julius tells him to take his best shot. One punch later, his severed head spirals through the air.

78. Small Town Police Work

The Film: Friday the 13th Part 2

The Victim: Deputy Winslow

The Gory Details: One of Jason Voorhees’ first victims, Deputy Winslow stumbles into the killer’s secluded backwoods hideout and takes a hammer to his head for his troubles. A simple death, but well done and pretty creepy by the standards of this series.

Continue Reading Every Friday the 13th Kill Ranked: 77-51 >>

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