The Dustin Hoffman And Meryl Streep Movie That Spoke To A Generation (But No One Talks About Anymore)

I was born 10 years after "Kramer vs. Kramer" came out. I was 12 when my parents got divorced in the early aughts, after which I lived with my mother and spent every other weekend at my dad's. I was in my mid-20s when I first watched Robert Benton's domestic drama that won five Oscars (including Best Picture and Best Director) in 1980 — well over three decades after its release. I was (and still am) a European, barely having anything in common with the Kramers, yet the movie spoke to me because you can't put an expiration date or age restriction on divorce, dysfunctional families, and absent parents. Separation is a bomb that will shatter your world if you're in its damage proximity. Though I was an adult by then, the past wounds of the little boy in me were reopened by that first watch, partly due to a better and more mature understanding of what happens to mom and dad when they can't be in the same room anymore. I already knew what happens to their kid.

That's the undying power of a film like "Kramer vs. Kramer."

There's an assumption about Benton's classic today that it vanished from the spotlight — despite its powerful depiction and conversation-starter subject that surrounded it at the time — because divorce, single parenting, and child custody battles have become more normalized and accepted over the years (a change in modern society the movie likely contributed to).

"Kramer vs. Kramer" was aimed at a specific generation at a specific time, painstakingly portraying a sensitive subject that was embarrassing to go through (or even discuss) in 1970s America. Yet its emotional resonance and intelligence clearly have never lost their intensity and delicate touch. If it's indeed forgotten, that isn't the film's fault, it's the audience's.

By today's standards, "Kramer vs. Kramer" is about a pretty ordinary situation. An unhappy wife (Meryl Streep) leaves her young son and workaholic husband (Dustin Hoffman) abruptly with little explanation, and the latter turns from a neglectful, part-time father to a loving, caring, and present one. This was a big deal in the '70s, and I don't think that's changed all that much today. We just don't get shocked hearing about a failing marriage that ends in divorce anymore. But if it happens to us, we still crumble as much as anyone ever did. Even if it's normalized, it doesn't really get easier to go through for anyone involved.

Perhaps the surprising spin on the story at the time was that instead of the father, the mother left, which wasn't as common back then. (Now, 69 percent of divorces are initiated by women.) That angle gave the story its emotional core. It was a wishful fantasy that so many kids left by their fathers wanted to come true; thus, Hoffman's transformation is the heart of the film. His character doesn't want this, nor is he ready for the responsibilities and obligations raising a young child requires. He's forced to try and make it work somehow, not realizing the many great sacrifices he has to make to not fail. He neglects his well-paying advertising job and eventually gets fired. It's the price he pays for developing a bond and a deep-seated love for his son (which wasn't nearly as potent before) which becomes the meaning of his life. As cheesy and sentimental as that may sound now, it's still as effective, heart-warming, and touching as it ever was.

If you seek out the best movies about divorce, Benton's classic is surely there on every list. It's imperative, integral, and essential to domestic dramas. There are certain films you can't talk about in depth without citing the influence of "Kramer vs. Kramer." It's a reference point in cinema history, and that doesn't change — regardless of how frequently (or infrequently) we talk about it now.

Just to draw a parallel, let me ask, how often do we cite and discuss Noah Baumbach's heartfelt "Marriage Story," which is practically a contemporary, modern version of "Kramer vs. Kramer" that was nominated for six Oscars and was the very movie that everyone talked about for a while? It's an emotionally rich, intelligent, and fantastic film stacked with stellar performances by Adam Driver, Scarlett Johansson, Azhy Robertson, and so on, yet the conversation about that movie has died down significantly since it was released in 2019 (only six years ago). Does that lack of ongoing conversation make it a lesser or weaker movie whatsoever? Of course it doesn't.

"Kramer vs. Kramer" may no longer be the kind of hot-button-film that frequently gets discussed by movie lovers, but that doesn't lessen its achievements and the impact it had (and continues to have) today as one of the most endearing, moving, and important movies about divorce, single parenting, and the many repercussions that separation has on people, both young and old. As of this writing, "Kramer vs. Kramer" is streaming on The Roku Channel.