LOL: The Best Jokes From The Roast Of Quentin Tarantino
We've all seen roasts on Comedy Central. The Roasts of Bob Saget, Pamela Anderson, William Shatner and David Hasselhoff come to mind as humorous events where a very famous person sits on stage and less famous, but more funny, people stand there and make awful, awful jokes about them. Most of the time though, I watch those and think, "I wish I cared about this person more." This week, a roast happened film fans can care about.
Quentin Tarantino got roasted at the Friar's Club in New York City on Wednesday and was ripped to shreds by the likes of friends Samuel L. Jackson, Uma Thurman, Eli Roth and Edgar Wright as well as more traditional roast participants like Jeffrey Ross, Sarah Silverman, Kathy Griffin and Richard Beltzer just to name a select few. The star studded event isn't scheduled to air on television anytime soon, so we've compiled a bunch of the best jokes made at the event and even found a video that'll give you an idea of the fun vibe.
Filmmaker Eli Roth has this to say to Tarantino:
It's only fitting, like Pulp Fiction, that I begin my speech with the ending...'However, to Uma, it was just considered foot-rape.'
Comedian Whitney Cummings got Eli Roth back with this one:
All your movies are about torture. If you're so into people getting tortured on camera, you should make a movie about people watching your movies.
Edgar Wright, who was a last minute replacement for Jackie Brown star Pam Grier, commented on his inclusion:
Of course I'm everybody's first choice to stand in for Pam Grier. You may remember me from Foxy Brown 2: British Fox, or Coffey 2: White Coffey.
Jeffrey Ross, the defacto King of the Roast, had a whole bunch of gems. For example, he called Tarantino "the most inglorious looking bastard" in show business. He also said that the name "Tarantino" must be an old Italian word for plagiarism, which lead to this:
I already roasted better versions of [him] so...You're like Martin Scoreso-so.
Here's another from Ross.
Thank you for making all us movie geeks seem a little cooler. You changed the face of cinema. I just wish cinema would return the favor.
Ross also has this to say to Samuel L. Jackson, in regards to how many roles he takes.
You really got to start saying the 'N word' more. And the 'N word' is 'no'.
Sarah Silverman remarked that Tarantino turned down the job to direct the film Speed, but that it was:
The first time he ever turned down speed.
Director Brett Ratner got in a few shots at the Weinsteins, saying that:
They build businesses without ever actually paying anyone, other than Oscar voters.
Rob Schneider commented on the absence of Pulp Fiction star John Travolta:
There was a 'F**s in Denial Who Believe in Aliens' convention.
Finally, Tarantino was able to fire back a few rounds, including one for Jackson. He said he had a little trouble with his jokes because:
I wasn't writing his dialogue.
That's only a small sampling of jokes that people who attended the event wrote about online. Uma Thurman told a few stories, Kathy Griffin talked about dating Tarantino, Harvey Keitel took the stage and more. Here's hoping the event becomes available at some point in the future. For now, though, check out this video from the New York Post.
Sources: EW, Hollywood Reporter, Cinematical