Over the past few months, Ben Affleck seen his Argo pick up the PGA, DGA, WGA, SAG, BAFTA, Golden Globe, and virtually every other statue in sight. Now it’s considered the heavy favorite to nab Best Picture at Sunday night’s Oscars, which would make it Affleck’s first win since his 1998 Original Screenplay Award for Good Will Hunting.

But even the most celebrated filmmakers have to start somewhere, and sometimes those beginnings are humble indeed. While Affleck’s first feature was the well received Gone Baby Gone, his earliest directing credit on IMDb is actually a little seen short titled “I Killed My Lesbian Wife, Hung Her on a Meat Hook, and Now I Have a Three-Picture Deal at Disney,” which Affleck himself has described as “horrible” and “atrocious.” Witness it for yourself after the jump.

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Good things are happening to good people in today’s TV Bits, which sees new sitcoms in the works for Conan O’Brien, Judy Greer, and Mandy Moore, among others. After the jump:

  • TBS orders a sitcom from Conan O’Brien
  • ABC develops new projects with Judy Greer, Mandy Moore, and Desperate Housewives creator Marc Cherry
  • The CW buys a thriller from Easy A scribe Bert V Royal
  • CBS yanks the already-cancelled How to Be a Gentleman from its Saturday lineup
  • Watch the first 9 minutes of ABC’s Once Upon a Time

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