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The network that gifted America The Two Coreys and Biography: Megan Fox is ready to release its new reality spin on COPS entitled Steven Seagal: Lawman. /Film was unable to confirm with A&E at press time that Seagal was shot and killed while akido-chopping a bum huffing duster in midst of crashing a glory hole ring.

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Wait, Machete actually needs a script not scrawled by knives in gringo blood? Following the recent, zany casting rundown for the cheapo flick that includes Robert De Niro, Lindsay Lohan, Don Johnson, and Steven Seagal (…walk into a bar), Latino Review have the first script review for the unlikely Grindhouse spin-off. You may recall that Jonah Hill was said to have passed on the film after reading a draft by director Robert Rodriguez. Well, LR’s reviewer is non-plussed by his script as well, calling it a rushed, whiz-bang effort, even for the Austin-auteur who sprayed out Once Upon a Time in Mexico. Some choice excerpts and a few thoughts on the project after the jump…

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Not too long ago there were rumors that Robert Rodriguez and Ethan Maniquis were looking at some outrageous names for Machete, the full-length version of the great Grindhouse trailer starring Danny Trejo. We basically knew that Lindsay Lohan was confirmed after she said as much the other day via Twitter. But now a Variety report on Overnight Productions, the outfit financing Machete, seems to confirm most of the great cast rumors. Details after the jump. Read More »

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Robert Rodriguez just does whatever the hell he wants to do, it seems, and what he wants to do now is Machete. (Or, more properly, that’s what he has money for right now.) That’s the feature film version of the trailer that ran as part of Grindhouse, featuring Danny Trejo as a bad-ass Mexi-can who takes revenge on greedy business types. Despite recent rumors about the film actually going forward I would have bet that Nervewrackers is next, but at CineVegas last week Danny Trejo told Gordon & the Whale that the film starts production in five weeks. (As noticed by the ever-vigilant Playlist.) More details after the jump. Read More »

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Earlier today it was confirmed that Robert Rodriguez would be developing/directing a reboot of Predator titled Predators. We speculated that Rodriguez’s next film would be the futuristic action thriller Nerveracker which has an announced 2010 release date, but Variety reports that Rodriguez will be returning to the Grindhouse before he goes to the future.

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In January, it was rumored that 20th Century Fox was developing a Predator reboot titled Predators with Robert Rodriguez and Troublemaker Studios in the producers chair. Rodriguez confirmed the rumors at a news conference today at Troublemarker Studios for the long-awaited reform of the Texas film incentive program.

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Robert Rodriguez has been chatting it up at SXSW and CinemaBlend has a few details direct from the filmmaker’s mouth. First off, Robert says that he always tells people that Sin City 2 is “right around the corner, because that’s what everybody wants to hear” but admits that “It might be a long corner.” I’m pretty convinced that a sequel won’t happen until Miller has no other film options, and is forced to return to the franchise.

Robert went on to insist that the long talked about feature length version of Machete will happen, and that he’s “got the script” and is “ready to go”. I’ll believe it when I see it.

The most interesting quote to leave Rodriguez’s mouth was in regards to his next project Neveracker, the sci-fi action film that was announced in February — “I used to say it was, it’s kind of like Blade Runner, but that was Blade Walker. This is Blade Runner.” Wow, just Wow. I’m pretty sure he didn’t intend to slam Blade Runner, but those are strong words. If this film comes out and is another Spy Kids, he’ll also be eating them.

Here’s a serious case of believe it when you see it (and bear in mind, the Grindhouse Blu-Rays need marketing right about now).

According to “rumblings around town”, given a public voice by Bloody Disgusting, the Weinsteins are putting some serious welly behind Robert Rodriguez’ Machete. Originally showcased as a faux trailer from the double bill version of Grindhouse, and then a high point of the Planet Terror DVD, Machete would be expanded to feature length from the 30 minutes worth already in existence.

In fact, it might be expanded far beyond feature length. Try three features’ length…

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Update (04/01/08): JoBlo reports via a reader who attended the same event as Bloody Disgusting that Danny Trejo said that Robert Rodriguez may “start up again” on Machete as early as this month. More on this as/if it develops…

Gore hounds and knife show infomerical zombies, rejoice! In yet more machete-related news, Blood Disgusting ran into fanboy favorite Danny Trejo over the weekend and he gave the requisite Machete update. According to Mr. Trejo, not only is the first (and only?) Grindhouse spin-off movie still happening, but there’s been talk of a trilogy. Keeping in mind that the first pseudo-exploitation flick would go straight-to-DVD, three of them wouldn’t seem completely outside the realms of possibility/profitability. Can you imagine the stain a Machete box set would leave on your coffee table?

He didn’t elaborate much more, but did say that Robert Rodriguez will direct the first film as well as produce, hopefully once he finishes up an unspecified project. If you’re wondering what Machete would be about, stare hard at the image above and squirt ketchup all over your screen. As much as I loathed Once Upon a Time in Mexico and was dumbfounded by the can’t-walk-the-talk dilemma that was Planet Terror, it would be great to see Rodriguez jam econo on three low budget action films in the spirit of a seedier, more nihilistic El Marachi. More on Machete if it ever develops…

Discuss: Machete Triple Feature? Could you handle it?

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