In college I was assigned to read something that argued all stories can be boiled down to a handful of classic texts. I never actually did the assignment, but when I explained to the professor I was sure the crux of the argument was merely a variation on essential lessons I’d already learned I was swiftly given an A.

This week Tarsem and his team of amazing technicolor dreamcoats are serving up an oddball version of the Snow White story with Mirror, Mirror. It’s not a particularly good film, but it isn’t awful either. It will eventually sit nicely on the shelf of strange cinematic extrapolations on classic fairy tale stories, which, as luck might have it, is the topic of this week’s TBMYPHS.

So close your eyes, my pretties, and get ready for a nice hybrid of creepy violence and overwrought moralism. Read More »

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“It was the egg rolls, not the ecstasy.” If you missed the second episode of HBO‘s revelatory Eastbound and Down last night due to misplacing your savings in an Oscar pool, that’s no friggin’ excuse! EB&D > “Jai Ho” on repeat. Will Ferrell made his debut appearance as a BMW dealer named Ashley Schaeffer, the embodiment of shithot blond ambition. Danny McBride‘s Kenny Powers continued his fall from the bleachers of Major League Baseball by hoovering blow in a school parking lot, capsizing a bird fountain, and mistaking a tween dance for a romantic rave. But perhaps what stood out most of all was the direction of David Gordon Green, who nailed an indescribable tone that fell somewhere between a hilarious Southern Sopranos, Freeway and his Pineapple Express.

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