Whenever New Line sees dark skies, as they no doubt have with The Golden Compass, they make sure to rub their golden poobah, Fred Krueger, and send him back down Elm Street. A Deep Throat inside New Line has whispered to Bloody Disgusting that plans for Freddy vs. Jason 2 are off, as is the A Nightmare on Elm Street prequel that had Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer‘s John McNaughton attached to direct. The source finally gets to the point, saying that Freddy is gearing up to return in a new ANOES installment, but leaves more questions than answers, like whether it’s a restart a la the studio’s Friday the 13th in 2009, a re-imagining like Rob Zombie’s Halloween, or a homoerotic metaphor like 1985’s Freddy’s Revenge. Nor is it confirmed whether Mr. Robert Englund will be involved, but we’ll just leave that to what lawyers call “good faith” and parents call “common sense, golly.”
Ever since he rapped with the Fat Boys, horror fans have pined for Freddy to toss his bag of rotten jokes and return to the truly scary claw-screeching supernatural killer seen in Wes Craven’s original. As someone who rocked a Dream Warriors puff-paint t-shirt purchased at Record Bar (!) in elementary school, I am that fan. Let’s also hope that studio head Bob Shaye gives the rest of His Dark Materials a chance, eh, because Freddy needs more than one movie to regain his street cred after Jason Voorhees bullied him around like Dawn Wiener in F vs J. Speaking of which, do you think Freddy’s newly detached head and Ms. Voorhees’ head have made out in Jason’s cabin? I do.