Posted on Tuesday, April 22nd, 2008 by Peter Sciretta
Lately, there has been a lot of hate directed towards Paramount’s live-action GI Joe film. As you probably know, a huge batch of unfinished unpolished character photos leaked onto the web last week which were deemed disappointing, especially after the official photo releases of Scarlet and Snake Eyes. So I thought I’d take a look at five cool nanotechnology elements we hear might be in the upcoming movie which are sure to get you a little excited.
Accelerator Suits: The G.I. Joe squad wear suits which enable them to run faster, jump huge distances, smash through walls, and withstand bullets. Rumor has it that the suits were designed by Tony Stark… nah.
A Nano-Bomb: The Cobra Commander hasÂ an evil plan to launch a nano-bomb. The scientifically created bomb consists of a swarm of microscopic machines that eat and destroy everything that isn’t organic. Basically, all machinery, weapons, and buildings would be left in the dust. Actually, I’m not even sure there would be dust… But if the Cobra Commander is such an evil super villain, why have the nanites stop at the human level? Why not just have them eat everything? My guess is that if they eat through organic material, the nanites might continue to eat through the earth like termites until it doesn’t exist anymore. The fact that Cobra Commander realized this risk shows that he is probably very intelligent.
Destro’s Mask: A swarm of nano-mites coat McCullen’s disfigured face, giving him the iconic metallic mask, which allows the Cobra Commamder to control his mind. In the original mythology, the Commander, with the help of Cobra scientist Mindbender, used mind control to bend Destro, the Baroness, Zartan and Billy to his will, giving Cobra a new high command.
Neo-Vipers: Destro controls a legion of super-soldiers which have been enhanced by nano-tech to allow them not to feel pain or remorse. How cool is that? Check out a photo of these guys pictured above from the old action figure line. A whole troop of these things could be really really bad ass.
Invisibility: Scarlett supposedly has a gadget which allows her to become invisible for stealth missions. Don’t let the Fantastic Four vibe scare you away, I’m sure this will lead to a kick ass battle sequence. In 2005, Hasbro released a line of GI Joe figures called Sigma 6 which included a Strike Team with Invisible Camo.
Now imagine a war movie like you’ve never seen before. A cross between X-Men, Saving Private Ryan and Robert A. Heinlein’s novel Starship Troopers. This is what GI Joe has the potential to be.