Machete Poster

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Numerous sites are reporting that the following poster is A.) new; B.) significant proof that Robert Rodriguez‘s straight-to-DVD Machete movie is moving forward or completed; C.) proof that, in hindsight, Grindhouse was the scuzzy masterpiece promised to us; D.) wall-worthy.

Unlike the SAT, all of these bubble answers are wrong, even D.), which is wrong by default because you’d have to trek into the mall and into the store, the one where 12-year-olds “buy” Doc Martens and Sex Pistols piggy banks, to purchase the Machete poster to hang on your wall. Unless you waited outside of the mall for it to come to you, in which case, we’ll count D.) and you can proceed to university in Awesomeville. View the poster in digital form and then consider practicing your rusty noogie technique after the jump…

Update: 010101. This is the /Film Hunterbot. 0101. I cleanup after Hunter human’s inferior, convoluted human style. 01010 The Machete poster below serves the promotional purposes of a motion picture called Grindhouse and not a separate Machete motion picture as many Internet websites incorrectly posted yesterday. 0101. A human interested in purchasing the Machete poster to hang on a wall will need to enter a store called Hot Topic. 010101. The human called Hunter does not believe this to be a valid option fo humans aged 12 and over. 010101. Like Hunter human, Hunterbot did not like Grindhouse, either, but liked three of four of the motion picture’s trailers. 0101010101001. Hunterbot’s favorite book is Microserfs by Douglas Coupland. 0101101. Hunterbot will gladly take Hunter human’s position at /Film. 01010. ‘Kay? 010.

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