With the Weinstein Company skating on financial ice, even with Inglourious Basterds breaking $100m domestic, the Brothers Weinstein are once again placing their bets on horror. As they should: their success has long been tied to the genre in addition to Oscar pics. Now that Rob Zombie is finished retooling the Halloween franchise—his sequel dropped by 70+ percent this weekend—Dimension and Bob Weinstein have announced a new writer/director for the next unrelated installment: Halloween 3D. Fangoria parlays that they’ve tapped Patrick Lussier to helm the first 3D outing of Michael Myers, due to start production for a quick 2010 release.

Lussier is riding off of the tidy hit that was My Bloody Valentine 3D, and he’s been a go-to editor for the Weinsteins’ horror pictures dating back to Scream in ‘96. Expect a more accessible, give-’em-what-they-want slasher outing. Dimension has also announced a new theatrical remake of Stephen King’s The Children of the Corn. Labor Day just got better for one guy! They’ve hired major screenwriter, Ehren Kruger, forever co-responsible for Transformers 2 (also: Scream 3), to re-haul the franchise. If, unlike us, you’re not yet muttering in a daze of muckkity muck like Col. Kurtz, more details after the jump.

The original Corn, directed by Fritz “Gor” Kiersch, was released in 1984 by New World, and though it remains a passable staple in Halloween marathons, it’s also pretty damn laughable. The film is more remarkable for being a whore that has unleashed a gazillion straight-to-bathroom sequels. Clearly Bob Weinstein is not satisfied with the series’ current disregard for artistic integrity. Indeed, the overwhelming feeling of disappointment has been eating at him for years, as if he swallowed the Outbreak monkey. He warrants a remake, like it’s friggin’ necessary in 2009, with…

“We felt the New World film was a missed opportunity,” said Weinstein. “If you read the short story, it’s got such a strong feeling to it and there’s this religious overtone to it as well. Ehren wants to hit it hard. It’s popular in Hollywood to say you re-envisioning a project but a lot of the time they’re just carbon copying the original. We are bringing something new to the story.”

Maybe Bill Maher will lend a scary cameo to the new and improved anti-religious remake. I’m not really curious to see whether Dimension updates the flick for the over-connected Twitter Era. Sans moon-lit scythes and corn-fed cult-sacrifices, kids today are pretty damn scary and rude enough already. Of course, whether the project actually sees theater screens is by no means a sure thing, especially if TWC experiences another bomb. The original Corn synopsis as follows: “A boy preacher named Isaac goes to a town in Nebraska called Gatlin and gets all the children to murder every adult in town. A young couple have a murder to report and they go to the nearest town (Gatlin) to seek help but the town seems deserted. They are soon trapped in Gatlin with little chance of getting out alive.”