UPDATE: It turns out that roughly 80% of the quotes in this memo came from FirstShowing’s Alex Billington. I should have known. ;) Alex’s glass is 80% full.

Not content with being owed one million dollars from Harvey Weinstein, vigilante blogger Nikki Finke has published an MGM internal memo that breaks down the online perception of Valkyrie 2.0 aka “Play down the eye patch and Valley Boy voice, win over graphic designers.” It makes for a pretty fascinating—if typical—look inside the Hollywood hype machine and how the Internet is a giant, throbbing Krang-like barometer. Make no mistake, all of those “awesome”s and “FAIL”s add up. Here are some enlightening highlights from the memo…

Currently, reactions to the Valkyrie trailer are significantly favorable (approximately 80%) within Entertainment, Fan-Boy, Video Sharing, Social Networks, Social Bookmarks, and Fan communities. Fans deem the trailer “fantastic,” often praising the “stylistic” way that the footage was cut and asserting that it is “way better” than the initial teaser.

But what about “the haters?” Will they “sink” Valkyrie’s suped-up battleship? No, their numbers have diminished and were “greatly exaggerated” to begin with…

The limited amount of unfavorable discussion (5%) stems from critics expressing general disinterest in the film, contending that the trailer makes Valkyrie look like “another Hollywood action movie.”

The surge is “working”…

The [new] poster comprises the majority of discussion, as fans laud the “stylized design” and hope that it represents the “gritty” feel of the film. “I definitely want one of these up on my walls right away.”

But when the “actors speak,” the buzz stumbles…

Lack of German Accents Still an Issue – While the majority of buzz about the lack of German accents is neutral, the topic is fueling discussion among online audiences. Critics contend that their absence creates a “lack of cohesiveness” while supporters believe that their inclusion would make the film appear “cheesy.”

The bottom line “…”

“the film has the potential to be “awesome” [but some viewers] still have their doubts based on the initial critical buzz.”

If a memo about this memo’s impact on viewers is leaked, we’ll let you know. Do you think Congress is privy to this type of futuristic and “extremely accurate” buzz-measuring?

Discuss: Give a number or stat that best illustrates your “anticipation.”